I told myself that I was going to take a much-needed break over the Christmas holiday and not write. However I find myself on the last day of my holiday reflecting, and thought I would share some of my thoughts!
Last year was a weird year, I went through tons of self-reflection, and made changes to better suit my values. In some ways it may seem I lost things in life but I feel more complete. I spent a lot of the last year worried about how I looked to other people, how my relationships looked, my appearance and what people thought of me in general. It was exhausting. I was spending so much time making sure that things in my life held value to others that I lost site of what I truly valued.
These past few months we’re really hard for me, for the first time I felt depressed never knowing what that truly felt like. I challenged the people closest to me and lost myself. It was around this time that I decided I didn’t like how I felt, I didn’t like the pressures I put on myself, so I decided to spend more time examining my feelings and what made me feel this way.
Since becoming a mother I have found it extremely easy for me to put myself last, my happiness, my needs and my overall internal health. Examining myself internally and thinking about what I wanted for myself, my family and my life really helped. Nowhere in those 3 things was their room for other people’s views on myself, my life and most importantly my family. It took time but slowly I let it go and since doing this I feel so much better.
One thing I love doing is writing New Year Goals. Things to aim for each year, and this years are so different from last but here is an idea of what I am looking to focus on in 2018.
- Patience – learn it, use it, be it. So often I find in all aspects of my life that I lack Patience.
- Spend less, Save more – Often I feel that I will shop to make myself feel better and it really doesn’t help. So I hope to put away a bit of money instead of spending it frivolously.
- Allow myself to be happy with myself – Life is not easy, I may not be super skinny, a person that everyone likes, But I am so blessed by my family, friends, home, everything and I just want to be happy with the person I am. Of course when I say this it doesn’t mean I won’t set goals to achieve but I also just want to stop being so hard and enjoy myself more.
Anyways I wanted to write this in the hopes that maybe you won’t put too much pressure on your New Years resolutions to change who you are, but that maybe you will enjoy yourself more. Happy New Year friends, I hope you all continue to be exactly who you are and love each day.
To humour you all my husbands 2018 goal for me: Fold socks.