The hardest blog I’ve ever written

It’s been a few months since I wrote a blog, I wasn’t sure how I wanted to talk about it. But it was a hard few months, and I feel like I need to explain myself.

When I was younger I suffered a traumatic event that caused me to develop social anxiety. It was extremely bad and slowly through counseling I was able to make it better. It’s been over 10 years since this happened and I found it coming back these past few months. Sometimes this consumes me, and makes me a very secluded person. I am not sure what triggered it these past few months, but it got very bad.

I think it started in December, the looming date of moving into a home I didn’t like. For the first time in our relationship, I let my husband make a huge decision for us on his own. Selling our first home I was ready for, or so I thought. Then we bought a home that to me didn’t feel like home. We moved into our New home in January and I felt incredibly lost. We went from staying in our friends beautiful brand new basement suite to living in a home with a kitchen with only 2 drawers. No junk drawer – how would I survive. Slowly we started to put our stamp on the home. Although now I am really starting to like the home and I didn’t feel better.

I am anxious about every social outing I attend, my husband is an incredibly social person and thrives in these settings and I feel like I could stay home and be safe.

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Then came February, we found out we were expecting our second child. I was so excited to be pregnant. We had just started trying and I had wanted this for over a year. But this pregnancy has been rough. I have been sick, exhausted and more sick. I didn’t know it was possible to hate every food group. The worst part is the heightened sense of smell has been so incredibly tough to deal with because every smell makes me want to vomit. It was so hard to tough through when nobody knew. I felt like crap all the time and couldn’t tell people why. My incredible husband stepped up so much, taking on so much. He cleaned, he cooked, he cared for our child, while I barely managed to make lunches and do bed time.

It was a weird experience for both of us, I felt great my entire pregnancy with Pearce. I never felt sick, and never felt sad. It made me wonder if I was even happy to be pregnant. We are now in our second trimester and I am still sick, but slowly my energy has come back, and I have started to feel better. Pregnant woman go through so many changes physically, that sometimes we forget just how hard everything is for us emotionally.

I spent the last 5 months feeling really low, and I know it started before December. But I have pushed so many people away and hurt a lot of friendships and relationships with loved ones, just because sometimes It feels better to feel alone. (For a second anyway and then it just feels incredibly lonely). It wasn’t until I talked to my sister and told her how I was feeling internally that I realized my social anxiety was back full force. It feels like everyone is out to get me, Like no good can come from anything. Like nobody truly likes you. The insecurities and sadness that I have felt, and pushed onto those near me has been so hard to deal with, most days it has felt like I have been stuck in a hole unable to dig my way out.

Which is why I decided to share it, talking to my sister gave me relief, slowly I would bring it up with friends and tell them how I was feeling, and slowly I felt better. So I decided to be incredibly raw and truthful with loved ones, strangers, and friends through my blog. It is my passion to write, since I was little and this anxiety has taken this away from me, So I felt like what better way to get out of my hole, then share it with everyone. Although I don’t feel ready to have one on one conversations with everyone in my life, I know this is a step in the right direction, and that I just need to push myself to get out of my comfort zone even if it means feeling incredibly anxious. Baby steps.. before the baby.

I appreciate all who takes the time to read this, and I know that I am not alone dealing with these issues. My hope is that maybe it helps you and something that you are dealing with. May we not suffer alone.

xOx Chelsea 

DIY Stone Fireplace!

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I am gonna be really honest, this move to our new home has been hard for me. I didn’t love our home at first sight like I did with our last, I didn’t get the feeling I had with our last home, I let my husband chose. We were getting super discourage, super stressed, nothing felt right. This home has great bones, its got a beautiful deck for entertaining and its rancher so really whats not to love!! I think we had worked so hard on our last home, doing a massive renovation of our basement, painting it from top to bottom that when we moved into a home that needed our love again I was discouraged. However since moving in I am slowly falling in love, of course I painted our home mostly white. I like to think of my decorating style as white on white on white – Which my husband hates! But he tolerates it because it has such a clean feel.

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So our new home is rancher and has a lot less natural light than our last home, so it has been an adjustment we painted the whole thing white, minus the bathroom and our master, I even painted a wood wall which everyone told me I’d regret.  PS I don’t! However we had this fireplace to deal with. My husband didn’t want me to paint it he wanted to leave it as he felt it broke up the white, and could be taken out down the road. But seriously since we moved in I knew I was going to be painting the stone all white!! The gas fireplace unit is very dated and had tons of gold detailing, which I knew I would just paint black like our last home. Lots of people suggested replacing it however that fireplace is a beastttttt – We’d be crazy to get a new one, they just don’t make ’em like they used to!

So last weekend was the Alberta Family day, and since my position at my work is actually for our Edmonton Branch, I was off Monday. Here was my chance, my husband had already told me he would be gone for most of Saturday and come home mid-afternoon Sunday. I knew he would never let me do it if he was home, so I waited for this family day weekend. (It is his best friends birthday so I knew he’d be out of the house).

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After he left I wasted NO time. I washed the entire wall again with TSP, after it dried I actually took a blow dryer to the wall to ensure there was no dust in the cracks between the stone – there was!! Then I chose to white wash the stone as I had been pinteresting them a lot and found some I had really liked. I purchased Rust-oleum Chalked Ultra matte paintLinen white, 1 887 ml can and a can of their spray paint – same color! I took a medium size Tupperware container and dumped the paint in, Then I added a whole Can of Water and stirred. I purchased a 2 1/2 inch paint brush,stain pro application sponge as well to help with the application. I started a the top of the fireplace to be able to touch up the drips.

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As I painted I held the stain applicator sponge under the paint brush to catch most of the paint and then I also used the sponge to get into cracks. Where the cracks couldn’t fit the sponge I used the spray point to get to. It was pretty tedious work but the end result was totally worth it and it only took about 2 hours. After the white dried I used Tremclad High Heat enamel in Flat black and painted our fireplace insert, it was extremely faded and had lots of gold so I painted the entire thing to keep the color the same all over.

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Best part, the whole project was done before my husband got home, so he has to just live with it!

I have read a few people who did the white wash ended up doing two coats, but I actually really like the texture that 1 coat gave us, Take a look and tell me what you think! This project is so important to me as it is the first room you see when you walk into our home and is a total focal point – I absolutely love my fireplace now and think I may love my house a lot more since completing this project as well! As soon as we find a couch we can both agree on I will post some pics of the entire space, as right now we have nothing in the room as we hunt for the perfect couch for this space!

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xOx Chelsea

Charming Beauty Betties – Lip Sense

not just a lipstick

If you would have asked me a few months ago about Lip Sense, I would have responded by saying oh ya that long-lasting lipstick. That was the gist of what I knew about Lip Sense. It wasn’t until I partnered up with Rebecca Lewis an Independent Consultant, that I actually tried the product.

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I started by just putting the color on my hand like most of us do to see what it was like, it dried so fast and it stayed on my hand for 30 hours – and YES I wash my hands a lot, before I eat lunch, every time I go to the bathroom, and I wash the dishes every night, it truly was Long lasting. Now I have never been a huge make up person, I have a few items but my frustration is always that around 11 am I feel like my make up needs to be re-applied and well – AIN’T NOBODY GOT TIME FOR THAT! I decided to try it a few days later, I was pleasantly surprised with how the clear gloss really moisturized my lips, and how long the color lasted, I apply my make up at 6am and I found I didn’t need to re-apply till 4pm.

what is lipsense

Not only did it seem to last long, the color was great, It was bright enough on my lips to add something to my basic everyday make up or glam up an evening, and I got LOTS of compliments! I started to discuss the products further with Rebecca and found that they don’t just make Lipsense. They have a few other products all of which are long-lasting!:

  1. Lip Sense – You might be wondering what makes this product so long-lasting, is it a lip stain – no! But the color does molecules that bond to your lips making it kiss proof and transfer proof!
  2. Blush Sense
  3. Shadow Sense – you can use this product on your lip – it won’t last as long as lip sense but it does make for fun color creating! it can also be used to contour or cover up dark circles
  4. Eye Sense
  5. MakeSense Foundation with anti aging SeneShield
  6. SenePlex Skin care line for all skin types – contains the science of SeneDerm and SenePlex complex which is a kinetic enzyme that affects the way cells glow from the bottom layers of the skin to the top! It also helps to renew your skin cells more rapidly to fight aging!

ingredients

Whats great about these products is they are all vegan, wax-free, lead-free and gluten-free. On top of that NONE of their products are tested on animals that alone is enough to support these products in my eyes! Their products are 98% Natural 2% science, they are completely open about what they put inside the products. They believe in their product so much that they also offer a 100% money back guarantee, which is something you don’t get from the drug store!

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Rebecca Before and after tinted moisturizer

It was so interesting learning about this brand, Rebecca found this brand through a family friend who sold her 1 lipstick which became many more and soon she found herself signing up to be a consultant! Being a consultant hasn’t always been easy, She too struggles with time management and balancing the work and family demands of motherhood. However SeneGence business is extremely supportive of the women in their brand and they do whatever they can to make you successful!

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If you’re interested in trying this product there are 2 ways you can do so, you can purchase it directly from Rebecca and then she ships it to you, or you can sign up for a SeneGence account which is kind of like Costco you pay your annual $55 membership fee, and depending on your order size you receive discounts from 20 – 50% off your order!

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Before lipsense, after 2 days of wearing

To order from Rebecca you can go to her Facebook page or email her at charmingbeautybetties@gmail.com and as a special thank you to our blog readers you get 5% off ANY starter kit all you have to do is mention discount code: FIRSTSTARTERKIT to receive your discount. Be sure to follow her on Facebookto learn more about these amazing products! Remember that you aren’t just supporting a company that care about the environment you’re also support a local mom!

xOx Chelsea

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wearing caramel latte

For more information on the product and color options scroll down!

tinted moisturizer

shadowsensee

shadowsense

makeup
Full Face Make up!
lipsensecolor
Which ones your favorite?
lipsense
My Favorite!
foundation
Information on the Foundation
eyebrow color
Did you know they also have eyebrow color?
blushsense
Which Blush Sense is your favorite?
blush sense
My Favorite Blush sense!